Last month was a difficult month. A friendship broke down (I don’t know why to this day, I haven’t even told Mum what went down because I would cry but I think she’s aware because mums know everything), then Roxy our dog gave us a big scare but thankfully she’s healthy for her age! Later in the month my Lil bro, partner and their gorgeous eight month daughter visited from Queensland for a long weekend which made me appreciate what I do have in my life. Elsie, my little niece from Queensland’s has a great grip and when she was in her pram, I put my hand down so she could grab it. She also enjoyed crawling next to me and looking up with her big blue eyes along with her eyelashes!
Last night The Stones song You Can’t Get What You Want entered my head without hearing it. I was introduced to this song in 2004 when I befriended a Melbourne singer-songwriter (well he really was the one who befriended me over chips with my parma!) who played this song at his gigs. Then of course the bold TV series Californication used this song in one of its episodes (it may have been the season finale). So I love this song as it provokes so many memories, mostly good. Last night as this tune entered my mind, I thought “appreciate what you have, try not to grieve over someone who tossed our friendship away.” I know I have a loving family and friends who love me. But it’s funny how one person can make you doubt yourself and cause you to think “Am I a crap friend? Are my circumstances the reason why some people let go? Could I do more?” Self-doubt crept in and for a while I found myself crying at night because I didn’t know the answers to these questions.
I’m finally getting out of this headspace and trying to move forward without this person in my life. I’ve started interviewing again, so keep an eye out on gigsninterviews.com. AND I’m so determined to interview Rob Thomas this year seeing his third solo album Chip Tooth Smile is released next month. Rob has right at the top of my interview wish-list since I began interviewing in 2010 and every time he has toured Australia, I have come closer to getting through to the relevant people who could make an interview possible for me! So that’s my goal for 2019!
I’m also trying to think of a way to make a little bit of cash to put towards a Queensland holiday. I enjoy working on websites and designing things (on the computer of course 😉) So if you have any ideas, please let me know.
Thanks for reading.
I hope you all are well and safe!